My Personal Best 15: Yuming Edition – #10 “Refrain ga Sakinderu” (The Refrain is Shouting) 〜The Ultimate Melody of Regret, Etching the Pain of Loss〜

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No. 10 is “Refrain ga Sakinderu” (The Refrain is Shouting)

For my 10th choice, I have selected “Refrain ga Sakinderu,” a masterpiece released in 1988 that continues to leave deep scars on the hearts of many to this day.
Music has the power to instantly bring back the atmosphere, scent, and heart-wrenching emotions of a specific moment in time.

When discussing this song, one cannot avoid the desperate refrain of “Doushite, doushite” (Why, oh why?).

The paths we have walked were not always smooth. In both work and private life, there are choices we didn’t make, words we failed to say to save someone, and irreversible partings. This song relentlessly, yet tenderly, scoops up the sediment of “regret” that we have buried deep within our hearts.

Liberal Translation of the Lyrics

I wonder why—why did we ever have to meet?
That spring sunset, where we held each other so tightly it felt like we’d break, will never return.
The regret of “If only I had been kinder” crashes over me like waves, tearing at my heart. No matter how many times I replay these worn-out memories, I can no longer hear your voice.

First, please listen to the official audio

Pay attention to the sharp drum scale in the intro and the somewhat cool, urban keyboard melody. Notice how the song suddenly accelerates into a dramatic development from there.

■ Credits
Song Title: Refrain ga Sakinderu
Artist: Yumi Matsutoya
Lyrics & Composition: Yumi Matsutoya / Arrangement: Masataka Matsutoya
Release: 1988
■ Quick Summary
The lead track from the album “Delight Slight Light KISS.” Famous as the CM song for the Mitsubishi Mirage, it is a monumental “breakup song” representing the Japanese pop scene of the late 80s.

The Abyss of the Heart, Repeating Questions Without Answers

The Weight of the Word “Why”

The most significant feature of this song is the repeated questioning of “Doushite, doushite” (Why, oh why?) in the lyrics.

As we become adults, the things we understand logically increase. We learn the life skill of convincing ourselves that “it wasn’t meant to be” or “it couldn’t be helped” during our working years.

However, this song strips away that adult mask.

The pain of loss that cannot be explained logically, the cry of a heart that cannot help but keep asking even when it knows there is no answer. Yuming confronts us with “that regret from back then” that everyone has experienced, using extremely simple words from which there is no escape.

Sound Design that Reverses Memory

The opening phrase of the lyrics says, “I’ll try turning back, to the curve just before this one.”

This is not merely a physical description of a drive. It is a symbol of a desperate human desire to return to the time just before happiness ended.

The street corners of Setagaya where I spent my university days, or the seaside scenery I used to frequent. In my own memory, there are places I am pulled back to—just before turning “that curve”—every time I hear this song. The loneliness of the other person I didn’t notice then, or my own selfishness. The act of replaying memories like restarting a worn-out cassette tape is sometimes painful, but perhaps that is also proof that a person lived earnestly.

Scenic Descriptions Depicting Helpless Solitude

The Afterimage of the Sunset Vanishing into the Bonnet

The brilliance of Yuming’s lyrics lies in their vivid visual imagery.

The description of the “sunset seen in the last spring” that “vanished into the bonnet.” This beautifully projects how the relationship between the two was ending quietly but decisively. The helplessness of being unable to chase the sinking sun, only able to watch it go.

By layering such imagery, the song transcends being just a “sad song” and screens a unique “story of regret” within the heart of each listener.

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Living While Carrying Regret

The Universal Pain of “Not Being Able to be Kind”

In the latter half of the lyrics, what strikes our hearts even further is the monologue: “Why didn’t I try to be as kind as possible?”

Arrogance born of youth, or perhaps being preoccupied with the busyness of daily life and neglecting to care for the person who should have mattered most. I believe this is an experience everyone carries in their heart. During my active years, when I held a position of responsibility, I might have believed that “strength” was justice and overlooked the quiet signs sent by those close to me.

Only after we can never meet again do we realize the magnitude of that person’s existence. Yuming presents this “irreversibility” as it is, without beautifying it. However, it doesn’t feel like she is pushing us away; to me now, it sounds like a paradoxical salvation, saying, “It’s okay to regret.”

When “Unforgettable Scenery” Turns into Purification

“By wandering through unforgettable scenery a few times, one can eventually stop regretting.”

I am convinced that this passage is why this song is not just a song about tragic love, but a philosophical book on life.

What is once lost will never return. However, the very time spent ruminating on that “scenery” in memory and living with the pain eventually becomes a process of accepting that experience as part of oneself.

Entering my 60s, looking back at the past, it isn’t all “brilliance.” Rather, it is the “shadowed” parts, like those sung in this song, that form who I am today. When I can think that way, the shouting refrain may turn into a quiet calm.

The Depth of Sound Representing an Era

1988, The Sound Ringing Amidst the Hustle and Bustle

1988, the year the album “Delight Slight Light KISS” containing this song was released, was the height of the bubble economy. It was an era when everyone was looking only forward, dazzled by rising numbers and flashy neon lights.

In such a frantic era, Yuming dared to release this song themed around “deep loss” with such a stylish sound. The soundscape, perfected with urban sophistication by Masataka Matsutoya’s arrangement, instead brings the silhouette of loneliness into sharp relief.

Back then, we might have consumed this song as background music for a drive. However, after several decades, for us now running through the “sunset” hours of our lives, this sound permeates our bodies with much more depth and reality than it did then.

Editor’s Note: What Lies Beyond the Refrain

I have chosen “Refrain ga Sakinderu” for the 10th spot.

Is there a “Why?” that continues to refrain in your heart even now?

If there is, perhaps there is no need to force it to disappear. I believe that the time spent listening to that cry and wandering through unforgettable scenery is an important journey necessary for us to mature richly as human beings.

The next time you hear this song, I hope your regret has turned into a slightly kinder memory.